Snake Eggs
by aleandros137
Summary: Orochimaru didn't want a student, but he got one anyway. Anko did not want some creepy weirdo as her teacher, but she got one anyway. The world didn't give them what they want, but it might have just given them what they need. This is the story of Orochimaru and Anko before everything began and how it all came to an end.


**AN: Honestly? I've been throwing this idea around in my head for a while now and since Naruto's ending soon and there probably won't be any ****_more_**** new plot devices I have to account for, I decided why not write it out? Enough rambling for now, here is the first chapter to what will hopefully be a regular series for me. **

**Snake Eggs- Prologue**

Orochimaru was not in a good mood which wasn't really all that surprising compared to how he acted most of the time, but today he had just a little more reason to be annoyed.

"But I don't want to teach anyone!"

The Sandaime stared at him, taking a long drag from his pipe before speaking, "When was the last time you actually talked with anyone, Orochimaru?"

Orochimaru blinked twice, "What?"

"I'm not talking about mission reports or grunting whenever someone greets you on the street. I'm talking about actual one on one communication with another human being" The Sandaime's eyes felt like they were staring right into his very soul as he examined the pale young man before him, "When was the last time you even went out of your lab for something that wasn't a mission, Orochimaru? It's not healthy for a grown man like you to spend so much time by himself"

Orochimaru scoffed, "So what? Do you want me to be like Jiraiya then? Peeping through holes at the women's baths and being an overall nuisance in general? Because if that's what you want sensei then just say the word, I am prepared as a shinobi of Konoha to go peep on as many women as you want me to, but let's get one thing clear. **I. Don't. Want. To. Teach. Anyone"**

Any lesser man would've been cowed by the venom in Orochimaru's voice, but lesser men did not become Hokage. Sarutobi sighed before leaning back in his chair and wondered why all of his students had to be so stubborn.

"It'll be good for you to spend time with other people and who knows? You might even grow to like it"

Orochimaru's raised eyebrow didn't agree with that statement.

"Just... give it a try, alright? I was hesitant about taking on a team at first too, you know? But look at all of you now. Jiraiya's gone on and become an excellent shinobi, Tsunade's one of, if not the best medic I've ever seen and you..."

"And I what? I stay in my lab getting pale and pasty? I make everyone scared by just being in the same room as them? Or maybe it's I don't understand why my dear old _Sensei_ just cannot comprehend the fact that I don't want to teach anyone!"

The look in Sarutobi's eyes suddenly became harder and for a moment Orochimaru wondered if he'd gone just a little too far.

"You can and you will take on a student, Orochimaru. That is final. You've been spending all your time in that lab of yours away from human contact and people are starting to talk"

The Sannin clicked his tongue, "Let them talk, I don't care what they think"

"But I do" The Hokage took his hat off, sighing once again, and placed it on the table, "I'm not getting any younger, Orochimaru and the day will come when I'll have to choose a successor. I'm not going to trust someone who can't even teach a child to lead an entire village of Shinobi and it's only going to be harder if no one in the village actually... likes you"

Orochimaru scowled and if looks could kill then this one could decimate the entire village. Orochimaru looked at the file like he waned to burn it before muttering under his breath as he swiped the file from his hands.

"Good Choice" Sarutobi said.

Orochimaru pretended not to hear that as he slammed the door behind him leaving the Hokage alone with his thoughts.

* * *

><p>Orochimaru walked through the Academy halls with a look on his face that said the very next person that tried to bother him would receive a very <em>slow<em> and _gruesome _death and people got the message.

Orochimaru trudged through the Academy halls, intent on putting fear into whatever snivelling brat he had been assigned to. Hours he could've spent on researching or training were being wasted on some child who probably didn't even know the first thing about the Shinobi Arts. It was madness!

He kicked the door open, expecting to find some youngster(People still said that right?) in the corner with big dewy eyes that had not yet seen the horrors of the world until now. What he did not expect was the sudden onslaught of kunai headed straight for him. Metal tools of death, glinting in the morning son headed straight for him before they were quickly swatted out of the air with a flick of the wrist.

Orochimaru didn't flinch either when the waterballoons started falling down, avoiding them with a quick roll forward. Not even the tiniest drop managed to spill on him, he examined the room to see what was coming next when-

"This is for being late, Shithead!"

A young purple haired girl wielding a hammer of all things, tried to attack him from behind. Key word there being _tried. _

Orochimaru made short work of the little girl, pinning her arms and knees to the ground in a matter of second.

"Mitarashi Anko, I presume?"

Anko squirmed under his grip, "That's Mitarashi-sama to you, Shithead!"

Well she was certainly... feisty and surprisingly strong for someone so young.

"My first impression of you..." Orochimaru tightened his grip on her, making her wince in pain, "Pathetic, what was your plan here exactly? That a fully trained jounin would somehow fall for your mediocre traps and not hear you declaring your attack? Not a very good pan"

"Shut up, Shithead!" She shouted, a small red blush on her cheeks.

Orochimaru tightened his grip once again, sending a jolt of pain through the young girl, "And another thing while I am your teacher I expect you to call me Sensei. Is that understood?"

Anko smirked, "How about we compromise and I call you Shitty-sensei?"

Orochimaru had a feeling that this would not be the start of a beautiful friendship.

"Meet me at the rooftop in thirty seconds, if you don't then you fail. Go"

Without another word, Orochimaru disappeared in a whirlwind of leaves.

Anko did not waste any more time before running up the stairs as fast as her ten year old legs could muster with only one word in her mind.

Shit.

* * *

><p>Orochimaru tapped his watch idly before a young girl burst out the door, heaving and panting.<p>

"You're late"

Anko looked up for a moment while still bent over, trying to catch her breath, "Fuck _haah_ you _hah, _Shitty-sensei" If she had enough energy to then Orochimaru had no doubt that she would've been flipping him the bird.

Orochimaru clapped his hands, drawing the attention back to him, "Well now that you're here we can begin the introduction"

"Introduction?"

"Your name, likes, dislikes, hobbies, goals and that sort of nonsense"

Anko plopped down to the ground, her face still flushed from the impromptu sprint, "Why don't you go first, Shitty-Sensei?"

Orochimaru glared, "My name is Orochimaru and I would very much appreciate it if you called me that"

"Why?"

"Because calling me Shitty-sensei isn't respectful"

"Why?"

"Because Shit is a foul word meaning feces"

"Why?"

"Because it sounds cacophonic"

"What does cacophonic mean?"

"... You're not going to stop this are you?'

Anko gave him an impish smile, "Just one last question and then I'll get off your back"

Orochimaru growled, "Fine, one more question and then you introduce yourself"

"Why are you wearing makeup? Are you gay or something?"

Orochimaru felt a headache starting to form, "First of all, I'm not wearing makeup and secondly, I'm not gay. Why do most people think that?"

Anko shrugged, "Well, with the makeup and all-"

"I'm not wearing makeup!"

"Suuure you're not" Anko winked

"I'm not, I was born this way!"

"And you can't change how you were born, so why don't you just embrace your identity as a creepy gay man and get it over with?"

Orochimaru facepalmed and tried to calm himself down before he ended up killing his newest student, "Look, we're not getting anywhere with this. Why don't you just introduce yourself and we can get this over with"

"Fine, My name is Mitarashi Anko and I'm ten years old. I like horror movies, sweet bean soup and dango. I don't like sappy romances,spicy food, and control freaks. Hobbies? I don't really have any unless you count pranking people"

Orochimaru found himself less and less interested as she went on, "And your goal?"

Anko gave him a smile, so blindingly bright he almost wanted to look away from it, "My goal is to become the most kickass ninja to ever live!"

* * *

><p>The Hokage sighed as he leaned back from the image on his crystal ball. Anko was certainly quite a handful, but that was why she'd chosen her to be his student in the first place.<p>

He hoped it would bring Orochimaru out of his shell and out of the path he was going down. Orochimaru was... ambitious perhaps just a bit too much. He always wanted more and more without understanding the responsibility that came with it. The man was a genius, strong, efficient and would never give up on something he believes in. In any other village, it wouldn't even be a decision, they would've made him the Kage straight away, but there was one important quality that Orochimaru lacked.

The Will Of Fire. The Hokage hoped that Orochimaru might learn from this experience and grow from it, but if he didn't then he'd have to choose someone else for Hokage. Jiraiya would never take the job, but...

What about Minato?

**AN: Is this an AU? I'm kind of having trouble deciphering the timeline because I saw her team in the Chuunin exam during Obito's flashback, but this timeline from Timeel39 says that Rin would've already died by then and Minato would already be Hokage. **

**Ugh, you know what? If someone could give me an approximate time for when exactly Orochimaru left the village, so I could try make my own timeline for this story that would be great. **

**Tell me what you think in the comments. Love it? Hate it? Say whatever you want in the comments and if you do like it then don't forget to favorite and follow-Aleandros137**


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